Dhan Dhan Parbrahm Parmesar and Sant Satguru Ji and Sat Sangat ji ||
By guru’s kirpa I have learnt a few things about my mind over the last few weeks which I would like to share:
1. The closer you get to God, the stronger maya comes to hold you back.
For example, Maya is a net and I am a fish, the harder I push to get out of it, the tighter the net gets to hold me back.
When we came back from seeing Baba Ji a couple of months ago we were supercharged – as baba ji says everyone who comes to him leaves having been lifted a few energy levels. Since coming back so much arguments and friction between family members caused ego to raise its ugly head. Followed by anxieties of planning for the future, guilt of leaving parents, and dreams of doing a meditation centre and seva. Net result was felt depressed last couple of weeks. Leading to anger and frustration. Asked baba ji why am I feeling depressed, he said because you have to get rid of all desires, then mind will drop away. I said but I’m only dreaming of doing selfless seva, he replied that even that was ‘a dream within a dream’. Meaning we are already in a dream – this life – and we should aim to bust out through the trikuti (third eye), not start making more dreams within this dream.
2. Satnaam = thank you.
Even doing simran on satnaam can be frustrating, because there are sublte desires of expecting spiritual rewards (seeing light, hearing sounds, feeling energy etc etc). But that leads to depression too. Found that mind only came to peace when I remembered Baba Ji said ‘a thankful heart will become a loving heart’ and that everytime someone says thanks it heals a massive hole of negativity created by negative people. So now I think of satnaam as meaning thankyou. And do simran just thanking Satguru ji for the gift of naam for which the debt can never be repayed, even by giving mind, body, wealth, soul, sacrificing family, friends everything to Satguru ji is still not enough. So just keep saying satnaam thinking "thankQ -thankQ – thankQ"
dust of your feet