13/1/04
My mind wanders in all directions, how can one control it? Mind is so big like the ocean, one thing (thought) pops out, than another! Lust is so powerful – a big enemy. The battle of the mind is a War indeed". Feels like I’ve just entered this game, feels like i’ve got a long way to go.
Mool mantra, i’ve been doing for the past couple of years, it goes up and down, i now try and concentrate with my mind with love.
And satnaam simran for a few weeks, since i read your e-mail on "what true name is". Which made 100% sense to me. Before i used to recite "waheguru simran".
Everything works according to ‘GOD’s will. We do nothing, as he created everything, he decides. We have to learn to accept hHs will. Its hard, but we have to prepare the ‘mind’ as everything starts from the mind.
I’m slowly learning now, how it all works, (mind is slowly accepting it). Also beginning to understand the cycle of ‘life and death’.
‘It is’ through good fortune that we have this rare knowledge (now on the satnaam.info website) – just as you said. I’m trying not to let ego take control of my mind, trying to battle with my mind.
Had a dream lastnite, well not exactly a dream…
Was fast asleep, mind just woke up, and i started repeating ‘satnaam’, ‘satnaam’, ‘satnaam’, ‘satnaam’. time was around 02:30ish.
Could feel myself going somewhere, mind became abit brighter. I got alittle scared, so managed to wake up slightly just to hold onto my little sword, which i keep beside my pillow. Then it continued. Similar thing happened nite before.
15/1/04
Woke up the morning, same time 2:30. Started reciting "satnaam", "satnaam", trying to really focus, the panj chor came again, but instead of reaching towards my weapon, i concentrated on ‘satnaaaaaaaam’ even more, and my mind focused harder and they disappeared. Came again, but not so strong.
19/1/04
I feel lost, i woke up today confused again. I was reading Sukhmani sahib on saturday and at the back of the book there was an article on "the importance of sant".
That we cannot get to god without true sant. In the company of the holy – sat sangat. I’ve noticed that my mind cannot remain constant, how can it? i’m a fool, full of ego! Mind is corrupted. So one minute i’ll be high then next down. Need for satguru. Under the instruction of Satguru I will remain in control, satguru will be my teacher, my guru, guiding me, making sure my boat reach’s god, and lifting me up everytime my boat sinks.
Satnaam Waheguru.
– i’m such a fool, worthless little worm.
13/2/04
Satnaam simran is going good, feeling less afraid, getting more confidence from Guru ji. Just keeping trust in guru and god.
I’m beggining to love this! Its amazing! Walking on the true path.
2/3/04
Was supremely blessed by Dassan Das ji with Gurprasadi Naam over email.
About 2:30am I woke to suddenly, mind just started to repeat satnaam and mool mantra.
I was so happy and relaxed, I knew this was something special.
I was just repeating satnaam, saying to GOD, just keep me repeating your name I don’t want anything else, just you.
And I experienced amrit/energy flowing all over!
Thru my head, back.
As my eyes were closed, I could see the dark becoming lighter
The more I concentrated the more it got lighter!
This energy lasted for about 25-30 min – continuous
15/3/04
Almighty lord has had mercy on this papi.
I had another dream, very short dream…..
I was walking around my house, and was following this little ‘kid’, probably about 1 years old,
The kid said something to me, said ‘jiven mukti’. Then I suddenly woke up…time was 1:30am…
I started satnaam simran, and mind became a little brighter….I got up and said to GOD.
I am nothing, you are everything, if you want I meditate upon your name..
I sat up on my bed and started satnaam simram, smiling, and happy, and just focused on GOD. Energy was flowing all over, mind became brighter…
‘Dhoots’ did’nt seem to bother me much.
Then I went to sleep.
May this mind for ever repeat the true name of the lord…As there is no other….
REPLY FROM DASSAN DAS JI :
Dreams and visions in Smadhee tell you your state of mind as well as give you the divine wisdom about what is happening to you now and what will happen in the future and also what was in your previous lives, so the dreams which bring in positive energy and divine messages are very good, the dreams that tell you about negative things are also good because they tell you what you need to improve upon in yourself, so always be thankful, your destiny is to be Jivan Mukt, and that what we have already told you and so has the Akal Purakh in the form of that little child you saw in your dream.
Naam Simran and the Naam itself and the Gur Parsaad has unlimited power, so anybody who will receive these Eternal Blessings will be Dhan Dhan and so are you, your destiny is pre ordained to become a Sant Hirda, just keep your faith, belief, commitment and trust on the Gur, Guru and Gurbani going higher and higher and you will see more and more wonderful things happening in and around you.
We are very thankful to Sant Baba Ji and Akal Purakh for your Sangat and for your seva, our head will always remain at the Charans of the souls like you all who are doing great seva of Sat Naam.
Dassan Das